December 2010 Projection and Patterns in Relationships

December 2010

Many of my clients have asked that when they are working on their relationships through meditation, working with their relationship patterning and the projections onto their partners, that these patterns or projections sometimes will not drop away. The pattern and projections will continue to play out in their relationship. My clients ask why this is and if working at this level does not make the projections or patterns go away then what is the use to meditate?

We must remember that we are working with the quality of our relationship to the pattern and to the projection. This is what will change in meditation. It is also to remember…if we are working in meditation to get rid of something then, we have not reach a level of compassion for the thing we want to get rid of.

For example, if we see our partner as too controlling, then we need to look at our relationship to control. Do we see ourselves reacting to controlling people elsewhere in our lives? Do we also fear no control in our life? If so, sitting in heart-centered meditation with no control will assist us in our relationship with controlling people. We will have compassion for we now have understanding and wisdom about feeling vulnerable to having no control. We will continue to see controlling situations and people but we will have little reactivity in those situations and toward those people.